Stuck In Reverse
The more I go, the more I do, the more I see you, the more I don’t see you, the more I eat, the more I exercise, I never reap any benefit, its all backwards, the more I go backwards.  I’m so tired and I’m so bored, yet I can’t control my anxiety and I can’t stop my mind from racing.  I’ll be doing great at work and yet the sink is full of dishes at home.  I will pay my rent on time and yet my car payment is two weeks late.  Will I ever catch up?

Chris gave me an Opana last night and all I could think about was how badly I wanted someone to tell me how much they loved me.  I wanted someone to tell me how important I am to them and all though I was sad, I felt so happy and confident with myself.  I can see how easily someone could get addicted to it.  I am becoming increasingly worried about my darling roommate.  I can’t recall the last time I saw him completely sober.

I’m stuck at work until 8 today.  Which kind of works out, Zach and I are going to go see Coraline at 10 and I was worried I was going to have to drive home, drive to go pick him up and then drive back to my house, then drive to the movies.  I’m hoping he will just stay the night so I don’t have to drive him home then drive back home again.

Whatever.  I’m pretty melodramatic.